Tuesday, September 14, 2010

I Am Enough

Over the last several years, I've heard many times that we teach people how to treat us.  I don't think I totally believe this.  Yes, if I accept crappy treatment from someone and they treat me crappy again, I guess you could say that I've taught them that treating me crappy is fine with me.  I know that eventually, I will get tired of being treated crappy though and I will change things.  I will either stand up for myself and tell them that I will no longer accept their crappy treatment of me or I will take myself out of that situation. 

The problem I have with the statement that we "teach people how to treat us" is no child teaches someone to take advantage of them or abuse them, yet so many of us have this happen to us as children.  Maybe this abusive treatment is supposedly what teaches us to accept the crappy treatment of others.  I don't know.  I'll need a lot more therapy before I have it all figured out and I don't know that I have that much money, time or even interest in knowing at this point in my life. 

One thing I know for sure is that I did not teach my long time friend to betray me.  I was a faithful, true friend to her, so her treatment of me was a total shock.  It's been just over a year since I found out about her betrayal and for some reason, the wound to my heart is sore this week.  I've been thinking about it a lot.  I've learned many things from this.  I've learned that I will not accept this treatment of me again, by anyone.  I'm a little less likely to trust as completely as I did before, although it hasn't affected the trust and love I have for my two best friends, my closest friends.  And the most important thing I've learned from this treatment is that I Am Enough.  If I'm not enough for you.  That's fine.  We can smile and part company and treat each other with kindness.  I - AM - ENOUGH!  And don't you ever forget it.  I sure as hell won't.

*Did you notice the heart shaped cloud in the photo?  I heard a noise on my deck, went outside and could find nothing but the cloud.  Maybe an angel making sure I didn't miss it?


Marsha said...

sorry for the loss and hurt you experienced. Humans are such frail and sometimes disappointing things. An animal wouldn't wound the way people do. take care,

A Box of Chocolates said...

A painful lesson well learnt by the sounds of things, so sad but often people can let us down. What a delight to look up and see the heart in the sky,

julochka said...

a heart shaped cloud - it was clearly to make your heart feel less sore. i'm sure writing about it helped as well. i know it always helps me. :-) blogging is cheaper than therapy, i say!


Tracey said...

Ouch! sorry for your heartache, but I'm glad you know that you are enough!!! your friend's actions caused her a friendship with a very kind being, so good riddance (LOL!)

Secondly, I believe the heart cloud was your sister, Teresa, telling you not to take any shit & that she's always there w/ya! :-)