Faith Haiku

death and grief hurt me
the road has been bumpy long
I need faith right now


grief eludes yet hounds
claws at me with dirty nails
soul says keep your faith



faith in living life
full rich happy creative
life to the fullest



Faith is the prompt word from Sunday Scribblings this week. It has really inspired me. I first put one haiku on this post and have come put and added two more. I wonder if I'll stop here or add more?

Boiling Water

What do you think of when you see that title? Those two words bring all kinds of images to mind for me. Like when I feel that I'm in boiling water and all kinds of things are going wrong in my life. I know that eventually, the waters will calm and cool and life will get back to normal -- or as normal as my life ever seems to be. They remind me of turmoil which I guess is basically the same thing I just described except that turmoil doesn't necessarily have to be about my life in particular. It could be our country or just one situation.

Well, in this case, boiling water is quite literal. We are having to boil our water to use it right now. Yuck. Double yuck. I cannot express the "yuck" I feel for this situation. I've told you that I live in a rural area. I also live near a lake. I assume our water basically comes from there. At some point each summer, they "turn" the water, which makes it smelly and dark. I hate that situation also. When that happens, I play little mind games with myself and pretend (at least while I'm showering in the nasty stuff) that I live in the days of having to go to the creek and get the water in a bucket. Now, I never try to justify the creek water coming from a modern day shower, it's my fantasy and I can do anything I want with it.

The need to boil though, well it's supposed to be safe to use if we boil it for 2 minutes and let it cool. We're boiling it for our dogs, but it has a nasty film on top after it's cooled that we find quite unappealing. I've decided to go ahead and buy bottled water for drinking, cooking and even brushing my teeth. My hubby says that the water is still safe to shower in and wash clothes and dishes. For that -- I'm having to pretend that I'm in Mexico. I wouldn't drink the water or use it to cook or brush my teeth, but I would shower and wash clothes in it since I'm adding soap to kill the bacteria. This is supposed to last for at least a week.

I know that in the grand scheme of things that are a misery to folks and true hardships, this is nothing. It's just a pimple on the butt of life, but it's a pimple on my life-butt and it's irritating. Until next time....

Spread a little Love

I told you about getting these fun rocks in a previous post. When I went to Dallas earlier this week, I spread the love a little a left a couple in the places I visited. The first one is at a Chipotle's restaurant in Mesquite, Texas.



Later I left one on a water fountain in an office building I had to go to. Remember that you can click on the photos to enlarge them if you want to be able to read the rocks easier.



I wonder how long the rocks stayed at their locations? I hope someone found them and fell in love with them and took them home. I was going to put one in a tree knot hole, but the hole looked deep and I didn't want it to fall in. Then I noticed a tag hanging from the tree on a nail. It got me to wondering if it had been there for years or if it was something someone had put there like I had been doing. I'm going to make sure to take my camera again next time I go there and if it's still there, I'll take a picture of it for y'all to see. Then you can tell me what you think it is.

This is for YOU -- Catherine

You may not have noticed, but I recently changed the photo of myself on my side bar on the right of my blog. I never really like the photos of myself. They always come out looking like me now instead of what I looked like when I was 25 or so! Yes, I realize that I live in a photo fantasy land. A place of wishful thinking. I freely admit this. But you know what, I'm OK with that, right up until I see the real thing. Anyway, my friend Catherine actually liked the former photo of me that I had up on the side bar. So, I thought I'd put in on the blog so that she can see it one last time and be able to find it if she really needs to see it again in the future. So, Catherine -- this is for you. Enjoy!

My Dream House

I often think of moving out of this house, especially lately. If it were not for the fact that my father built it, I would have moved long ago. A log home was never my dream.

My dream house


Would be one level.

The laundry room would be in the house and there would be a place to hang clothes as I get them out of the dryer.

It would be on about 5 or 10 acres (I have over 27 now).

It would be one of those cute little farm houses. (I don't know the name of the style)

It would have a deep wrap around porch with rocking chairs and screen doors.

There would be more than ample storage. So much that I could keep my Christmas tree decorated and just cover it each year and wheel it on in to the "Christmas" storage area.

I'd have an actual guest room.

I would have a room for a studio and I'd put a Murphy bed in it for extra guests.

The kitchen would be much bigger than the one I have now and it would be so nice that I would actually want to cook.

There would be room for a dining table somewhere.

I would have a dishwasher and a window over the kitchen sink.

I would even have a fireplace.

My dream house would have no cedar in sight. There would be no mud. And it would have a claw foot bathtub.

Ahhh to dream, the impossible dream.

I Get to Wash!

Two years ago, I bought one of those fancy, energy efficient washing machines that is computerized and has a larger capacity drum. It was on the lower end of the line of all of the different ones available, but I was so thrilled to have it. Two weeks ago, I started having the first trouble with it that I'd had since I bought it.

Unfortunately, the trouble I had was major trouble and it was going to cost as much to fix the machine as it would to buy a new one. That really pissed me off! So, I did indeed buy a new one. Momma reminded me that daddy used to say, "the more buttons something has, the more things can go wrong with it". I switched back to a brand I was more familiar with and went with a more energy efficient model with lots less bells and whistles.

They delivered it today. I've been without a working washer for about 2 weeks. You want to talk about a mountain of dirty clothes? I didn't think so. At least if you want to find me, you'll know where to look for the next few days. It will take a while to catch up. After all, I can't wash while hubby is sleeping (he works nights) and I don't want to wash when it's dark. I have to go outside to get the laundry room remember. The dogs go berserk until they realize they get to go too. So, it takes a while. The first load is almost ready to come out. More later.....

Movies

I love movies! When I was much younger, I wanted to be a movie critic, but I realized that there were only a few of those jobs around and someone would probably have to die for me to get one. Now, at the time, I thought the only movie critics were the ones that I could personally pull up on my own TV in Dallas, TX -- so that would have been local Dallas area critics and the ones who had national syndicated shows. There was no such thing as the Internet back then or even home computers, so I didn't realize there were as many local movie critic jobs as there probably actually were. Then I realized that I'd have to sit through a lot of "crap" movies that I had no desire whatsoever to see and I kind of moved my dream into a different field.

I still loved movies though. Sometimes, my Momma and I would get together on a weekend day and she and I would see three movies in one day. I know that sounds like a lot, but it was fun to us. I'd just leave my son at home with his daddy. They got to bond and I got a fairly cheap day out. The price of a matinee was much less back then and I didn't have babysitting costs.

Now I live in the country where there aren't as many options, movie prices are much higher and they seem to all be made for teenagers or young men. There aren't that many that I go to the theater for any longer. I do miss that at times. Tonight, was not one of those times. I just watched Hachi: A Dog's Tale at home. I rented it from netflix. (Despite what I say after this, I did like the movie.) If I had watched it in a theater, I would have sniffled and my throat would have been extremely sore from trying not to cry in public. At home, I sobbed. This movie really tore me up. I won't ruin it for those who haven't seen it, but let me just say that it hit me hard. OK, I'll say this much -- to me, it was not just about loyalty, but also about profound grief. Which is probably why it hit home for me. My eyes hurt, are swollen and red and I only have half a box of tissues left. I'm off to see if there is anything funny on netflix on demand.

I Really Like to Post

I really like to post on my blog. I mean I really like to do this. I feel like I'm talking to a group of friends, even if I have no idea if anyone is actually reading any of it. My goal is to post every day. I do miss days of posting -- sometimes, many days in a row. Then I'll come back and post three times on one day. I'll get lots of ideas and I don't want to end up with them flying out of my little old head. You'd think I'd keep a book for post ideas. I've thought of that, but there never seems to be one handy when I think of an idea, although I have at least half a dozen blank books around here somewhere. And if you have a peri-menopausal mind like mine, you know that I can hold a thought about like a colander holds water. You young ladies will understand this one day. Don't worry. Your time is coming. Anyway, that forgetfulness is my life at this point.

So, when I was visiting Tracey's blog Quietly Kickin and Screamin yesterday and she mentioned the blog Sunday Scribblings as a place to go for ideas and inspiration for blog postings, I headed on over. They post their new idea on Sundays (just like their name says) and since I looked in for the first time on Friday, I decided to just take a look around and grab an idea that suited me. This is what I'll try to do whenever I want to write and I have no idea of my own in the future. This idea comes from June 12, 2010 -- Superhero(ine).

I have a couple of real life Superheroines and a Superhero. The first is my Momma.

She went to work in the early 60's when most women were still stay-at-home moms. At least most of the moms I knew were. Then when I was 8, our dad went to work overseas and she basically became a single parent. When he returned, they divorced, and she became a real single parent. She raised my sister and myself with patience and grace. She made sure we had the things we truly needed and enough of the things we wanted to feel special and for life to feel magical at times. But she also made sure we didn't get everything we wanted. I think that is a gift, in and of, itself. Momma didn't drive back then, so it wasn't easy for her to get things done for us, but she did. She always found a way. Even if it meant riding three different buses in each direction to do it. She is the most patient person I know and she has the ability to stay out of arguments that my sister and I would have. That ability irritated me during the arguments (because I wanted her to side with me!) and I admire it greatly now. Momma and I have always had a good relationship. I'm grateful for that. She is my biggest Superheroine!

My other Superheroine is my friend Catherine. She is without a doubt the most honest person I have ever known. She will not give her opinion unless she is asked for it, but baby if you ask for it, you better put your big girl panties on and be ready the real, honest answer because that is what you are going to get. She never answers in a rude or cruel way, but she does answer truthfully and completely. I love that about her. Lots of folks can't handle it. Like some of the people she has worked with over the years. She doesn't play office politics. She's honest. There are many, many other things I love about Catherine. Things that I admire, but her honesty is the thing that makes her one of my Superheroines.

My Superhero is my son.

He got married very young. Right out of high school. A couple of weeks after graduation I think. He went into the Air Force just a couple of weeks after the wedding as a way to continue his education and to provide for his young bride and himself. He became a father after about a year and a half of marriage. Before long, two more kiddos came along. He reenlisted in the military, knowing it was the best option for his family. He plans to make it a career at this point. He is a good provider for his family. He is a recent widower and he is making sure his kids are OK. He is taking care of things. He knows he can call on us, but he wants to do it himself. He is a good man. A kind man. A good father. I cannot begin to tell you how proud of him that I am without dissolving into tears. My son is my pride and joy and it's because he's done it all himself. I'm happy to help him in any way I can. I want to help him. I hope that I can take some of the pressures off of his back at times. I wish for him joy and happiness, peace and love. He is my Superhero.

Little Tidbits and Updates or What's Going on

I told you that I had joined Postcrossing over the weekend. Yesterday, one of the first postcards I sent arrived in NY! I get to send off another one now. This one will go to SC. Of course the other 4 are still traveling to their various countries. They may take a while to get to their new homes.

I showed you the first 20 postcards I had made at moo in this post. I only have three of those original 20 postcards left. Thankfully, my new order of 60 postcards have been shipped and should be here by Monday. I'm so excited at the thought of getting them! I cannot wait to look at each of them and see if they look at good as I hope they do. I'll plot and plan which ones to make again and which ones to skip. Who to send this one to or that one. It's really been fun! I've had requests for some of them! Can you believe that?

You may remember that I had a vanity license plate on my car related to quilting. Well, I'm still a quilter, but I don't feel that the old license plate represents me any longer. So, I got a new one.



This plate reminds me of what I've come through. It reminds me of my new mantra. After I ordered my new plates, I got an email message from a lady who works in the My Plates public relations department. She wanted to know why I picked the plate combination that I did. So, I told her the significance of the word "enough" for me (which you all have heard before, so I'll spare you now) and I told her that the "T" had come to represent my sister Teresa. This is what I said: "She died very suddenly and unexpectedly in April, younger than me. She would want me to live my life to the fullest and to be as happy as I can possibly be. When I see that part of the plate, I will remember her and remember to seize the day."

The Houston Quilt Festival will be held Nov. 4-7 this year. Last year they had a wonderful exhibit of photos taken by quilters. It was one of my favorite exhibits in the show! This year, they're doing it again, plus they're adding a haiku exhibit! I love trying to write a haiku. I sent in three, the maximum number you can enter, last night. I probably should have stewed over them and tried to make sure every word was just right, but I wanted it to be fun. So, I have entered the Houston Quilt Festival! For the first time ever! If I get in, great. If not, that's OK too. I had fun.

The Summer Day by Mary Oliver

I saw this today on one of my very favorite blogs - Ornamental - and thought it was delightful. I just had to share it with you! If you've never stopped by Ornamental, be sure you do and be sure you have a few minutes to spare when you do. It cannot be rushed. Nina is such a wonderful writer that I often wish her blog was a book that I could hold in my hands and revisit over and over. She's a wonderful photographer also.


The Summer Day

Who made the world?

Who made the swan, and the black bear?

Who made the grasshopper?

This grasshopper, I mean-

the one who has flung herself out of the grass,

the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,

who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down-

who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.

Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.

Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.

I don't know exactly what a prayer is.

I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down

into the grass, how to kneel down in the grass,

how to be idle and blessed, how to stroll through the fields,

which is what I have been doing all day.

Tell me, what else should I have done?

Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?


- Mary Oliver